I Feel Like My Boyfriend Is Bored Of Me. What Should I Do?

Beginnings are fascinating, you’re all over each other and you just can’t get enough. You miss him the minute he leaves and you find yourself sniffing through your clothes just to find a hint of his lingering perfume. 


But, what happens after this honeymoon phase? How do you keep the butterflies alive and well? How do you keep the fire burning bright?


Do you feel like your boyfriend is slowly growing bored of you and you’re trying so hard to keep the romance alive? Do you feel like he’s just sitting there nodding his head as if he’s engaged in the conversation, but you feel like his head is somewhere else? 


Well, there’s a difference between feeling relaxed with each other after the honeymoon phase is over vs. feeling completely bored out. What comes after the honeymoon phase is not supposed to be awkward; you’re supposed to be at the place where you feel completely comfortable around each other, you enjoy the conversation as well as the silence. 


You have to be able to tell the difference between being “relaxed” vs feeling “bored”. So, before we tackle the solution to this problem; it’s a good idea to be able to identify the signs of boredom. 


Signs That He Is Bored


1- Most of His Time Is Not Spent With You


He would rather hang out with his friends, coworkers, family members, but not you. If he lives 10 minutes away and can go on a whole week without seeing you, then most probably he’s bored. 

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In a healthy relationship, your guy should always yearn to see you; no matter how long you’ve been together in this relationship. He’s supposed to miss you and feels the need to check up on you. 


2- The Conversation Feels Forced


Again, silence is supposed to be comfortable in a healthy relationship. However, if one partner is feeling bored, then the silence will feel like it’s the most unnatural thing on the planet; on the contrary, silence can feel so loud. 


Moreover, if it feels like it’s only you who’s talking and filling him in, then that’s a major sign that he’s bored. He no longer feels like he wants to share details about his day with you. If he’s scrolling through his phone while you’re talking to him and if he feels disengaged in the conversation, that’s your big fat red flag.


3- He Makes You Feel Clingy


He Makes You Feel Clingy


Does it seem like you’re the only one initiating phone calls or texts? Does it feel like you’re always the one who’s asking him to hang out? 


Are you the only one who keeps canceling plans and moving your schedule around just to see him while he’s not making any effort back? This makes you doubt yourself and it makes you feel like you are this needy clingy person who can’t get enough; it also makes you feel like you’re being annoying! It’s the worst feeling in the world to feel like someone doesn’t need you the same way you need them, right?

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4- He Picks Fights Just To Stir Drama


The relationship feels so mundane and boring to him that he actually picks fights just to have some action. The fight means that you have to spend some time apart and then get back together; this makes things less boring for him. And what’s even worse than always picking a fight?


Well, the answer is: Never fighting or arguing about anything at all. He doesn’t feel like anything is worth the argument because then he would have to sit down and deal with it. He’s nonchalant and couldn’t care less.


What Should You Do?


So, now you know the major signs and red flags that your man is feeling bored. What should you do? Is it something you can fix or is it something completely out of your hands?


To begin with, it’s valid to state that “boredom” is natural in every relationship we have…even if you have nothing but love for each other. It’s what makes relationships interesting and what makes people fascinating. 


BUT, what’s not normal is staying bored for a long period of time. In fact, feeling bored can be dangerous for a relationship; bored partners tend to cheat and seek amusement elsewhere!


Moreover, if you feel like your “bored” partner is not doing anything about this and if he’s not making the effort to change the state he’s in, then, yes…you have something to worry about.


The truth is, relationships require effort from both sides. You have to work on keeping the relationship healthy and sometimes, you have to put in the extra effort to keep the spark alive. 

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The rational thing to do is to sit down and have a mature conversation about this state of boredom and to discuss possible solutions. Possible solutions may include:


1- Committing To Date Nights


Go out on dates more often; don’t just settle in for a night-in and Netflix binge. Dress up and get to know each other as you did on your first dates. 


Committing To Date Nights


2- Romantic Weekend Getaway


Always go on honeymoons; it’s a sure way to keep the spark on fire! Discover new places, get indulged in new cultures, and try exotic foods together. This will make your bond grow stronger, you will have new subjects to talk about, and new memories to share together.


3- Always Flirt


Do you remember the sweet beginning of your relationship? You always flirted with each other on the phone, via text, and in person. 


Who doesn’t like to be flirted with? It just boosts our ego and makes us feel more attractive to the other person. Flirt. Always flirt with your man and let him know that you have eyes only for him!

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