You’re sitting in physics class and your teacher is explaining Newton’s law of gravity. You have no idea what he’s talking about and it’s like you’re not physically there; even gravity can’t bring you back to earth!
Your eyes are following the teacher’s hands, you’re contemplating the way his lips move, you’re devouring the sounds of his own voice, and you’re creating scenarios in your head. You have the biggest crush on your teacher and can’t help but romanticize your story together.
Having a crush on your teacher is pretty much normal. In fact, it’s rather common to fantasize about a teacher at some point in your life; we’ve all had that one teacher who made our hearts jump whether we were 14 or 24! I remember having a crush on my Psychology teacher- who was over 60 years old at that time.
It’s not wrong to have a crush on your teacher; however, it’s wrong to act upon it.
In this article, we will help you process your feelings and get over this crush in a healthy way.
1- It Never Ends Well
This is a reminder that if you come clean to your teacher about your crush, it will never end well. This is not a Hollywood movie and this isn’t a love song!
Let’s think this through, in your best-case scenario, you will come clean to your teacher and he will feel the same way about you. You get together with your teacher and you miss the best days of your student life secretly hanging out with your teacher.
You will be missing out on all parties, all hangouts, and all the fun. You will hate yourself forever for missing out and you will grow to resent him as well.
And if you get caught, he might be facing serious consequences, such as expulsion. PS, the consequences are going to be much worse if you’re a minor.
In your worst-case scenario, he will not feel the same way about you! He only sees you as his student and now you’ve made it awkward for the both of you.
Chances are that he will be talking about it in the teachers’ lounge and you will be remembered as the girl who had a crush on her teacher.
2- Know Who To Share With
It’s a good rule of thumb to remember that NOT everybody is your best friend; some people may think of you as their frenemy. Also, some people have a naturally big mouth that loves to talk and a big nose that loves to meddle.
When you want to vent, make sure you talk to someone you know you can trust. It could be a good friend, your big sister, or even a professional.
Talking to someone about it will help you process your feelings in a healthy way; it’s never a good idea to bottle your feelings and ignore them like they never even existed.
Processing your feelings might help you realize why you have this crush and where this is coming from. For instance, you may have a crush on your teacher because he’s the authoritative figure you’ve never had.
Or maybe you have a crush on him because he is full of confidence and you wish you could be this confident.
Remember that it’s very easy to confuse admiration with attraction. For me, I figured out later that the crush I had on my 60-year-old psychology professor was all about my admiration for him.
I also figured out that there’s a whole theory about patients falling in love with their psychologists and the phenomenon goes by the name “transference”.
3- Invest Your Energy Elsewhere
Now that you’ve come clean to yourself about your feelings, it’s time to invest that energy and put it towards something else.
A huge part of processing your feelings depends on NOT dwelling on them. If you keep thinking to yourself “I have a crush and I will never get over it”, then I assure you that you won’t.
Consequently, getting over your crush requires some work you have to do. Believe it or not, having a crush on somebody consumes your energy; remember that “love” itself is energy. What if you can take that energy and invest it in yourself?
What if you could become that “A” student and get that scholarship? What if you could put that energy into a part-time job that would help you pay your student loan faster? What if you could work on your writing skills and achieve your dream of becoming a writer?
4- Enrich Your Social Life
Trust me, getting out and having an active social life will help you get over your crush!
It’s easier to get over someone when you’re too busy to even think about them. Staying home on a Saturday will force you to listen to love songs and create fake scenarios in your head.
Hang out with your friends, meet new people, and get in touch with your old friends. Who knows, you might end up meeting someone really cute!
This somebody is going to be the same age as you and you will get to experience everything with them; it won’t include sneaking around and secretly meeting them.
If you believe that you don’t have many friends, or if you believe that you don’t have the capability to make new ones, just try to focus on what you do best. For instance, if you love reading, you can join a book club; it’s a sure way to meet new friends and develop new crushes as well!
This way, you can live your high school or college life to the fullest. I promise you, these days can be the best days of your life; they are never coming back and you can never be this young ever again!